Saying Goodbye Ambassadors

Miscarriage and still birth is often something that’s not acknowledged or talked about in the UK, and people certainly do not appreciate how utterly distressing it is for parents, and indeed their extended families. It’s a loss of a precious life, and whether the loss happens in early or late pregnancy, at birth or in infancy it’s traumatic, and a natural grief process must be allowed to happen. Sadly a lot of doctors and nurses see loss on such a regular basis, the right support and follow up advice is just not offered, which results in vast amount of parents never coming to terms with losing their baby, and sadly they are not able to move forward with their lives as they become stuck in a cycle of grief.

I am delighted to be an ambassador for The Mariposa Trust, an organisation dealing with the suffering caused by miscarriage and stillbirth, by not only offering crucial support to those who need it, but by also working with hospitals, trusts and many other key organisations to support and advise on fundamental changes that can help bereaved individuals. The work is conducted through two divisions. Saying Goodbye offers support and befriending to anyone who has lost a baby, and it also runs national remembrance services, which allow families to come together to mourn their lost babies. The services are held at Cathedrals across the UK, and more information can be found at www.sayinggoodbye.org. GrowingYou is the second division, and offers support to anyone who is pregnant following loss, as the fear of losing again can be profound for many people: www.growingyou.org

The charity was founded by Zoe and Andrew Clark-Coates, who themselves have lost five babies. Having experienced this agonizing pain and grief themselves, they are perfectly placed to not only offer wonderful support, but also to be a voice in the national media and at governmental level.

I am so proud to be supporting the Mariposa Trust and their ground-breaking work. Because of the vast range of services and support the charity offers, families are now better supported and know that their loss has been recognised. The causes of miscarriage and stillbirth still need to be more widely understood, but this dynamic organisation is helping tens of thousands of people each and every month.

I am absolutely delighted to be an ambassador of Saying Goodbye charity. The help and support that this charity provides to families who have suffered the loss of a baby through pregnancy and childbirth is unique. The sensitive service gives families a real opportunity to say their goodbyes in a supportive but positive environment irrespective of the gestation of the pregnancy loss or age of the baby.

As a midwife for many years, and through my community of family and women friends, I am aware of the terrible grief of the loss of a baby, through miscarriage or stillbirth. I remember when ‘it’ was not spoken about and the parents were left in a shadowy bereavement where grief could not be shown or was not recognised.

When I was Professor of Midwifery at Queen Charlotte’s Hospital in London I was contacted by a woman who had lost her baby in miscarriage many decades before, and she contacted me to ask if I knew where her baby might have been buried. She had never forgotten.

Zoe and Andrew Clark Coates the Founders of Saying Goodbye know this grief, the grief of loss of your baby and also the promise of new life, of a newly formed family, of joy. Saying goodbye to the baby you love is heartbreaking.

I am delighted to act as Ambassador for this wonderful new organisation that offers National services and International support to all those who know loss first hand, or for the extended family, who also feel the pain, when a baby passes away either in pregnancy, at birth or in early years.

The services will take place at Cathedrals and Minsters around the UK, and I know they will be pivotal to so many people who want to mark their loss and remember their babies. To have others recognise the significance of a person’s loss is also a key to the healing process.